Drunkenness...fading. Hangover...is being saturated with a jug o' water. I was sensible enough to rummage through all the kitchen cupboards when I got in in order to find the biggest water-holding vessel I could. And I did!

Christmas should be a day where everyone is forced to stay in bed for a full 24 hours, and have a refreshing sleep. Tranquilisers should be provided for insomniacs, the elderly and very small children.

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