It's Autumn!
2012-09-26 | 11:54 a.m.

Greetings Diaryland, how the hell are you? I have been busy having a glorious August and a so far even gloriouser September. Work is still in its slow summer phase and I've only been doing one or two days a week, which has been lovely for me but not for my bank balance. It has not deterred me from booking a trip to Las Vegas for Halloween, however.

I spent most of August watching the Olympics, which feels like a lifetime ago now, but it succeeded in renewing what had been my perhaps wavering love of London. I've been looking at the city with fresh new eyes. I especially enjoy the four-mile run I do along the Thamespath and which ends at the Tower of London, whereby I habitually purchase an ice cream and catch the DLR home.

I also bit the bullet and joined a subscription dating website, Guard1an S0ulmates (thanks for the tip, Holly!) and it is without a doubt one of the best decisions I've ever made. The free website (Oasis) I was on made me regularly shake my head with dismay. In general the men on there had minimal literacy, neck tattoos or both. One man on there even had the following baffling description of himself:


I don't know why I didn't snap him up really - I mean, who doesn't love the otatdoors?

Soulmates immediately had the edge in that it contained people I actually wanted to go out with, so that is also what I have been doing a lot of these past two months. I had a sort of micro-relationship with one very nice man on there called Tim, who took me to the Ivy Club for cocktails. The Ivy is incredible - it's the kind of place I would fantasise about going out to in London when I was a teenager. It's twinkly, beautifully furnished, has a piano player and a cocktail that gets served in a totem pole-shaped receptacle. Utter heaven. After six dates and a realisation that chemistry was somewhat deficient, I think on both sides, it was time to say, "Bonne chance in all your future endeavours!" and move on.

For a brief while at the beginning of September I was dating three people from Soulmates and IT WAS EXHAUSTING. Flatmate James chuckled at me over this saying, "I love how being tired from going out with too many people is the biggest problem in your life!" and amazingly it was. There was Pete who loved Simpsons and was dark and sultry looking and we went out twice - once for drinks and once for a boat trip over to Greenwich. He had to go when it transpired he still lived with his parents, in Essex (after going out with Blackadder last year I have learnt I am not happy to always be the host in a relationship) and he kissed me too hard and too infrequently.

The second of my September datees was Alan, who was a tall, gorgeous, beardy surfer type with his own camper van and a mutual love of Glastonbury. Absolutely perfect on paper. We went for drinks for our first date (I have taken nearly ALL my dates to the Porterhouse in Covent Garden!) and for our second to watch Back to the Future at an outside cinema in Shepherds Bush. I think sometimes it doesn't matter how good looking and friendly someone is, when your heart's not in it your heart's not in it. That's how I felt about Alan.

The one who's presently deserving of my attention is Ollie. He first messaged me mid-August when I was still thinking things with Tim might have begun going down the serious route, but he was very funny and seemed kind and bright and my interest was very much piqued by him. Fast forward more than 20 messages and we met up for a drink a couple of weeks ago and I wanted to kiss him within about 10 seconds of meeting him, which is always a good sign. He appeared to enjoy my company, and that's even with me blurting out, "This is worse than an exam!" when he was asking me questions about myself.

We went out again two days later and last Tuesday he gave me a red rose and took me out for Cuban tapas (yum!). Yesterday we went out for a mischievous jaunt in Southend, where he lives, and the day was just perfect. He brings out the best of me - unfortunately yesterday this was playing the 2p falls in the seafront arcades in a frenzied manner (I won four keyrings though!) and then taking great care and attention with a cone of chips to ensure the absolutely excessive amount of ketchup I put on them was "funnelled down the various chip channels." He made dinner for me in the evening and I stayed over and on the train into London today I made him watch my favouritest ever Youtube video, which is "Funniest Crystal Maze". I most likely have posted this here before, but I have seen it at least 20 times and it still makes me nearly weep with laughter.

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