strawberrri.diaryland.com
You look like a monkey
2005-04-18 | 2:27 p.m.

I was getting a bus home from town a few days ago and happened to pass a pub not that far from where I live. Outside the pub was a banner, which read (referring to a football match):

'WERE SHOWING, THERE PLAYING, YOUR WATCHING.'

I nearly died a pedant-related death and had to muster all my strength to not go and buy a can of spray paint and replace the offending words with 'WE'RE', 'THEY'RE' and 'YOU'RE'.

The New Bloke, true to his word, is an amazing cook. Unfortunately when I met him on Friday he was a coughing, sneezing, spluttering mess and, inevitably, managed to spread his delightful germs on to me, rendering me a coughing, sneezing, spluttering mess. The only good thing is I've been consuming at regular intervals a cheap version of Lemsip I bought from some dodgy shop, which makes me feel drugged up to the eyeballs and not care that I have a cold which makes me feel deaf.

The final chapter of my dissertation is not going at all well. I went to the library on the last day of term to get out the books I believed to be relevant to what I'm meant to be writing about. Having glanced through said books I think the only thing that can have happened is that my brain was replaced with that of a demented pixie who made me frolic around the library selecting books that are about as useful to me as a pair of oven gloves are to an ostrich. Ah well, live and learn I say. And I still have a fortnight to write the damn thing anyway.

In other news I was topping up my hair dye this morning (with 'Chestnut Brown') and managed to dye a strip of my forehead. That was clever. If I go out and spend enough time in the sun the rest of my face might go brown enough to compensate, though knowing me I'll probably end up looking like a tomato. A tomato with a strip of chestnut brown on its forehead. Oh goody.

One last thing: HAPPY BIRTHDAY RACHEL!

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