I was going through my memory box earlier and came across a workbook from when I was at school circa 1991 and about six years old. Here is an extract:

"On Friday I went to Davids house and we played hide and seek and we had some biscuits and some bread and when we had fininshed we had to go home but me Adam and Richard didn't want to so we went to hide but they found us then we went to Richards house and we painted some clay and on Saturday I stayed at home and played with my toy and on Sunday I stayed at home and played with my toy and we ate sweets."

I was a party animal even at that age too:

"On Sunday I went to James's party and first we played pass the parcel and then we played musical statues and then we played musical bumps and then we played musical chairs and then we had the party tea and there were crisps and there were wotsits and there were radishes which Erik ate most of them and David spilled the coke and then we had chocolate fingers and chocolate numbers and then we had the cake and then we had one more game and then we had to go home and first we droped David off and then we droped Richard off and then I went off to my own house."

Christ on a bike! I should surely have got some award for writing the longest sentences ever. I would say they're sweet memories, but they're just memories of eating sweets really. I'm surprised all my teeth hadn't fallen out by the time I was eight. And if they had it would be all my parents' fault - for not chaining me up in the attic and giving me a bucket of fishheads to eat once a week.

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